Not to put you in a box or anything, but according to a recent study helmed by Exponential (a digital advertising network) if you were born anytime after 1980 you likely fall into one or more of the stereotypes below. The story was published last mont in AdWeek, and we wanted to share it with you here. Though undoubtedly accurate, the study kind of makes you feel like a cookie cutter human, stripped of anything that might make your life story unique. On the other hand, there’s something comforting about knowing that we’re all on the same boat here. Bryan Melmed, Vice President of Exponential and lead researcher on the project, analyzed 4 million young adults and presented his findings at a conference in New York. According to him, every “millennial” between the ages of 18 to 34 will be represented by one of the categories below. Have a look and let us know if you can relate!
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“Hey #GirlBoss!”
These power females are ambitious, assertive and have their eyes set firmly on the career prize. You are a Boss Lady if you career is one of the most important things in your life, and you’re willing to wait until you achieve your professional goals before starting a family. You are educated, motivated, and self directed. Perhaps you started your own company, or are freelancing it to the big time. When in doubt, look to Beyonce, patron saint of Boss Ladies, for guidance, or Sophia Amoruso, self-appointed queen of the #girlbossdom. But who are we kidding, you’re rarely in doubt and know exactly what you want out of life.
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“Everything old is good”
You know you are a Nostalgic when you rock a perfectly coiffed mustache circa 1922, brew your own beer, and spend your free time typing your next novel on your vintage typewriter. You smoke a pipe, and insist on using an analog camera in spite of the smartphone in your pocket. Your life basically looks like a Wes Anderson movie. The world can be a scary place, you take comfort in the past, listening to old records, maybe even enjoying an afternoon of bowling.
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“Life is a journey, not a destination”
Travel Enthusiasts aren’t your average vacationers, these are people that are passionately consumed by the idea of destination-less wandering. You fall into this category if you’re planning on backpacking across Europe after college, and/or roughing it at hostels across South America. You’re an adventurous free-spirit who shuns maps, comfort, and a predictable lifestyle. Think Christopher McCandless from Into the Wild.
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“Would you like fries with that?”
This is probably going to be 99% of you reading this right now. You know you fall into the Underemployed category if you’re a Forever 21 sales associate with an Poli-Sci degree, or waitress with a Masters in Fine Art. Whatever you’re doing in life right now, it’s definitely not what you spent years at college training for. Chances are, you are way over-qualified for this gig. You watch The Devil Wears Prada and relate only too well to Northwestern-graduate/Coffee Runner/Assistant, Andy Sachs. Staying too long in this category will send you reeling into Quarter-Life Crisis (see below.
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“Dude man! I’m killing this hackathon right now!”
You know you are a Brogrammer when your passions include tech start-up companies, strong beer, and coding in a Red Bull-fueled rage. Fellow brogrammers include Facebook-founder Mark Zuckerburg and Snapchat-creator Evan Spiegel (and 75% of the San Francisco population).
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“Some eat to live, you definitely live to eat”
You know you are a Culinary Explorer if you read Kinfolk Magazine, bake your own bread and can easily tell the difference between a mediocre bottle of wine and an exceptional one. You have a taste for quality and will settle for nothing less. You most likely live in a city and know every obscure hole-in-the-wall eatery worth it’s organic salt. A perfect example is Stephanie Le, creator of iamafoodblog.com.
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“When Even The Small Things Seem Out of Reach”
You know you are a Shut Out when you’re unemployed, sitting on your couch, maybe playing video games, gazing forlornly at the forgotten Philosophy degree hanging on your wall. Shut outs made the mistake of studying something incredibly impractical, or have dropped out of school entirely, and are thus struggling to find decent employment. Not wanting to settle for less than they think they’re worth they’ve opted to wait it out until something great comes along. Except that it often doesn’t. Think of Seth Rogan in every single role he’s ever played. If you’re not careful, the gap between your skills (or lack thereof) and the world out there will continue to widen until the only kind of job you’ll qualify for is in fast food.
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“#latergram”
Exuberants live for social media. You know you fall into this category if you can’t go for more than an hour without checking your twitter/snapchat/instagram accounts. You may even have multiple accounts on each platform with a respectable following. To you selfies are not just for fun—they are an art, an everyday way of life. Your spirit animal is Tom Haverford from Parks and Recreation.
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“Those that see but remain unseen”
You know you are a Collector when you consider yourself to be a viewer or a connoisseur of content rather than a creator of content. You might be a Pinterest aficionado, an Instagram stalker, or maybe even an Internet troll. Collectors are the dark matter of the Internet. They are everywhere, taking up most of the space, but you don’t see them. They are hard to describe, because they’re kind of just out there, watching, reading, collecting photos and inspirational quotes, but never creating any of their own content.
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“Why do I feel like a child in an adult’s body?”
You know you are a Quarter-Life Crisis Millennial when you graduate college and realize with overwhelming dread that you now have to get a real job and become a real adult when inside you still feel like a confused kid. Suddenly you feel the crushing burden of doing something with your life. But what? You debate over becoming a writer or maybe a photographer—no wait, what about a web designer? Zach Braff’s character from Garden State understands your pain.
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“It’s easy guys! Here, let me show you”
You know you are a Millennial Martha Stewart when you are a self-proclaimed DIY queen, and have at least one successful blog. You can make a skirt from a yard-long sheet of fabric with no problem. Your Youtube channel is a collection of makeup tutorials. Think The Beauty Department founder Lauren Conrad.
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“Strong enough to bear the children. Then Get back to business.”
You know you are a Millennial Mom when you manage to walk out of the house looking perfectly put together despite staying up until 5 am with your crying baby. You shop organic, buy local, drink cold-pressed juices, and care about the environment. You love your baby, but love yourself as well and feel the need to experience it all, the perfect career, the family, the travel and the perfect living space. You spend a lot of time finding inexpensive ways to make your home look designer chic. Though not quite a millennial mom, Gwen Stefani manages to look better than all of us even after having 3 kids.
